


Attack of the Capekat

by Badfaith



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, Not Really?, Porn With Plot, erikar - Freeform, kind of, sort of, wwaffles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-04
Updated: 2012-04-04
Packaged: 2017-11-03 00:53:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/375258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Badfaith/pseuds/Badfaith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All of a sudden, Eridan couldn't bring himself to care about much else, especially not reasons or explanations. Whatever the fuck this was, it was a good thing. Probably.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Attack of the Capekat

The time was ripe for reaping and the young hunter was too much of an old hand not to use it to his advantage. It was a wild night, the gale howling in cold bursts off the ocean like a pack of pissed off barkbeasts. Winds that didn't send each other perigree's eve cards were veering off course and crashing into each other rudely, giving the rankled waves all sorts of split ends and bringing surprised fish farther into shore than they wanted to go.

 

It wasn't the dumb fish he'd be going after though, but rather those _big_ fuckers. The monsters would be searching for prey too, using the mixed swill of scents to creep up on their prey. However, Eridan wasn't worried. He was _excited_. The wind hadn't let him sleep, beckoning him out of the coon seductively with its ruckus. He pulled himself out and came to stand by the window in nothing but his bare skin and skivvies. He surveyed the new night he'd been presented. A tempestuous wreathe of clouds and salt air, fit for a fucking prince. His pissy little partner-in-slime wasn't too fond of the crashing noises on the roof of their hive and just sank deeper like a swamp creature. But to Eridan, the cacophony was a bloody siren song. He couldn't sleep in and miss all the fun. What kind of predator would he be?

 

The only thing standing between his gorgeous royal ass and a big comfy throne of battle-victory was his clothes. Kar had said he was going to throw a load in earlier but when he'd chanced a look in the Automatic Arid Cloth Tumbler all he found was his shirt, pants and long, argyle socks. (Not his scarf because obviously that had to be dry-cleaned and he was always aware of where it was.) He poked around the freshly laundered clothes for his cape and when he didn't find it, he instantly got suspicious. Augh, he'd probably forgotten it. Figures. No one else gave a rat's ass about style around here. Kar put more effort into decorating his fucking pancakes that he did his own body so of course he wouldn't remember these important details. What a crying shame.

 

In a bit of a mood, the seadweller stalked around their hive for a short time unsure whether he should go in there and wake him up or not. A naïve Eridan of bygone days would've been bold enough to try, but after a few unspeakably violent misadventures, he had long since decided he'd rather chill out there with the hissing bloodthirsty monsters than try to wake Karkat up too early in the evening. The safest policy was: whatever it was, it could wait until the sky got darker.

 

Glancing out at the that bright evening sky again, he sighed in frustration and ranted under his breath, bitching only to himself. Apparently alone in their seaside abode, he flopped down onto the ground in a tantrum and sulked a while before reaching for his heavy hunting boots. Just because SOMEONE misplaced his cape, didn't mean he was going to miss out on his big night. He slipped his feet into his socks, wiggling his toes for a second and then started wrestling into his boots. He became fully absorbed in the activity, strapping them down tight as life lines because if it wasn't pouring outside now it sure as hell would be soon (-- another reason why his goddamn cape would've been nice to have).

 

Putting on these heavy duty boots was a bit harder than he gave himself credit for. He was so distracted that he absolutely did not see it coming when he felt a set of course fingers start to pull his scarf loose from behind. He started, but relaxed a second later, not even bothering to turn around.

 

Really, who else could it actually be except the one and only crabby apparently nude troll who happened to share his living sp-

 

Waaait a goddamn minute. Nude? Except for... Hey, was that his fucking cape!?

 

Eridan sat there, flummoxed as a bare, slender body pressed up behind him, feelings knees lock around his crouched body neatly as cutlery in a cupboard. An embrace or ridiculous vertical spooning? Whatever it was, it was attractive. What a pretty picture the two of them would make if someone were inclined to draw it.

 

All of a sudden, Eridan couldn't bring himself to care about much else, especially not reasons or explanations. Whatever the fuck this was, it was a good thing. Probably.

 

In that moment, his jaw made several attempts at helping him form words, started and failed like a sputtering ignition. He gave up, falling quiet with a pursed mouth that gradually slid up into a small smirk. The more he became accustomed to Karkat's body against his own the more things he found to like about this situation.

 

“Mm.”

 

The landweller's unkempt hair prickled against his neck, warm lips starting to press deep kisses just under the cut of his cold square jaw, at first gently and then with purpose, as if he was punching cookie shapes. The seadweller exhaled with a hitch in his breath, feeling good, bubbly feelings starting to flow from the same place his hunting excitement had come from. He rolled his shoulders, his muscles tingling pleasantly. Okay. This was nice.

 

He lolled, lazy in the attention until the corner of the high collar tickled against his princely nose. The seadweller wrinkled it impetuously towards his aggressor, but the other troll wasn't looking.

 

His voice couldn't decide whether it was bitchy or amused when it broke the silence. “So that's wwhat happened to my fuckin' cape, huh? You thievvin' little _beast_. ”

 

The only response was an hot puff of air against pale flesh that very nearly got a gasp out of him. As if in spite, the kisses became punctuated with little nibblings. When the nibblings turn to the edge of his sensitive fins, Eridan's slender fingers released his bootstraps. The footwear crashed to the ground in a heap with a flat _THUNK._

 

“Someone's pretty fuckin' friendly tonight,” he observed. The Cancer gave no response except a low hum some illegible tune against his skin. Karkat was almost tone deaf, but his lips felt nice. Eridan could sense his glasses making a slow decline down his face but he didn't bother to push them up. Who even had time for that bullshit.

 

The seadweller rolled a quiet purr out of his throat, half in objection to the quiet, half in real, genuine pleasure. Attention was always welcome, especially when accompanied by body heat. His naturally cold skin absorbed the warmth and the electric currents from the cold press of Kar's sharp teeth eagerly, hungrily even. His bulge twitched in interest and he shifted where he sat, feeling a brief, intense heat like the wash of a warm southern current on his muscles, especially the lower ones, prickling in arousal under his skin.

 

"So wwhat noww, are you givvin' me the silent treatment?” he asked, throwing a teasing wave into his voice. Although even with a naked matesprit on his back, Eridan's curiosity could not be ignored. Nor his desire to tease the fuck out of Karkat.

 

“ _Kar_.” He prodded, insistently. Cripes, half the time he couldn't get Kar to shut up and now he was trying to get him to talk!

 

“Goddamn it, _what_?” His matesprit snapped irritably, focused on what he was doing.

 

“Take off the fuckin' cape,” Eridan ordered flatly, squeezing his hand hard over Kar's knee to further assert his authority. “You're gonna get it dirty.”

 

For a silent, awkward moment, he wondered what kinda reaction he'd get. Not gonna lie, he was sort of nervous. It was a shame to roll the dice on Karkat's tempestuous mood, particularly in such a rare situation, but he couldn't resist for the same reason he couldn't resist running off into the rain to hunt huge ornery beasts. It was kind of in his blood to be a confrontational asshole. It was his _thing_.

 

That is why his insides did all sorts of twisty things when the thin lips tensed for a moment. Suddenly, the gentle nibble-kisses turned into one swift, mean bite in the sensitive area between his fin and neck. Eridan's entire body stiffened like a board while at the same time, he sensed a sly little hand slip under his shirt and graze along his belly, hesitating with Kar's thought process and then giving it a fierce, mocking rub.

 

“Hey!” he growled crossly, squirming a little and bunching his shoulders in an attempt to shake him off.

 

“Why don't you summon some rudimentary motor skills and take it off yourself, sandy-ass?” Kar murmured, seemingly contrite about the whole thing. His arms tightened around Eridan's sinuous form a little more securely, as if to say _I CAUGHT A SEADWELLER_. His fingers dug in and started tugging, pawing-- at Eridan's shirt. He even neglected to snag it on his horns this time which was always something of a rite of passage for the pair, and dropped it unceremoniously somewhere behind them.

 

As if trying to fit himself in that junction, he cuddled, cat-like against the inside of his neck, his voice still raspy but treated with a teasing lilt. “I help wash some of the fucking clothes and I help take some of them off too. Looks like I'm really _booked_ all of a sudden. Where's it written that _I_ have to do everything around here?”

 

Eridan snorted and immediately started babbling his head off once given the — so to speak--- red flag. “I'm the goddamn prince. You're lucky that I'm evven toleratin' all this blithe disrespect. I could havve you fuckin' keelhauled y'knoww.”

 

He sucked in breathe for the reaction and almost let his guard down until he felt the faint sting of another fierce nip to his neck that made him wince and graze his sharp teeth over his lower lip. Typical mutinous matesprit behavior.

 

“...Wwouldn't evven make a big splash if I threww ya ovverboard.” he continued in a low growl. “Evven the fish wwon't be fuckin' interested.”

 

“What do I have to do to get you to shut the fuck up?”

 

As Kar spoke, one hand relaxed and fanned out against Eridan's lower back... It slid, palm flat, up the curve of his spine. Tense and responsive to his touch, an enthused chill raced it to the finish line between his angular shoulder blades.

 

Eridan suddenly wanted to kiss him with just about every 'w' in his accent. No stranger to callous plunder, he twisted around and planted one right on him. Just as their lips collided clumsily as cannon-fire, he made a move to grab the wriggly little fucker and hold him down for a mandatory sloppy make-out session. No excuses accepted, no refunds. They were doing this. They were making it happen.

 

But his matesprit knew that game and he wasn't about to let Eridan take control of the situation. He didn't so much as slip from his grasp as tumble too hard into it, like a caught fish one wasn't really expecting to fight back too hard but holy fuck: _did_.

 

Eridan found himself being forced backwards. Together, they made a veritable pileof troll and the seadweller ended up flat on his back, blinking up at his matesprit stupidly. Barely breaking the kiss, Karkat's torso slid over him as easily as a seal sliding down an ice flow, his mouth was much less graceful then that, but eventually found it's place and held it.

 

There was not much effort on Kar's part to keep his teeth out of the way and soon, Eridan twitched as a sharp sting as one pierced a plump lower lip. Above the sweater line, Eridan had to be _careful_ with his own pearly whites but Karkat could do whatever the hell he wanted. How was that fair? Where was his fucking justice?

 

He had no way to complain with that wet muscle invading and teasing against his own, his gray skin tingling with the need to feel more of it. The persistent ache pressed deep, like an arrow, into lean muscle tissue and straight into that cold pit of hollowness in his gut. Eridan tightened his strong arms with satisfaction around that small body. His hands gripped Karkat's lower back as he arched up into the kiss.

 

His knees ground into the floor, Kar backed away for want of breathe. Tiny specks of Eridan's blood glittered on his lips in the dim pink shafts of light filtering between spaces in the curtains. He looked up and Eridan saw his tongue dart out, to sweep those purple jewels away.

 

Eridan was caught at once by familiar narrowed gray eyes, just beginning to become ringed with fire. They were just starting to come in, just as his own were developing a purple ring that would eventually dominate the milky gray. The lime green contacts Karkat now habitually wore didn't seem to catch him so well and so savagely. Karkat had him. Karkat wasn't letting him go.

 

Eridan crooked a finger against that full cheek, crooning mockingly. “Purple's a good look on you, you knoww.”

 

He watched, grinning as that brow furrowed in a very disapproving bracket and put little wrinkles on that forehead. It was almost cute enough to make Eridan just want to kiss him again, but Karkat slipped down instantly, without a word. Eridan got a fistful of that unmanageable black mop and gave it a short tug that couldn't have hurt him in the slightest. “Did you become a mime in your sleep or somethin', Kar?”

 

Silence.... Hmph.

 

The seadweller began to feel slightly put off by his matesprit's refusal to speak. He did get awfully focused on tasks when he decided he wanted to do something but this was just...

 

Suddenly, his train of thought screeched down an unfinished track and exploded when Karkat bent to suckle the tiny strip of flesh between Eridan's lean pectorals. His hand twitched uselessly for a few moments before he tightened his grip on Karkat's back. His claws grazed flesh freely, his fingers grinding painfully against soft skin. Karkat jerked, grunting in offense but retaliated with a vindictive bite that left a purple rings to join the other less-than-subtle marks on his skin. Somewhere below his surface thoughts, Eridan realized that he could feel Kar's growing hardness occasionally grinding against his belly.

 

Just as he was thinking, _God I wish he'd let me out of my fuckin pants already_ , the roaming digits stopped just above his gills and then danced his fingers over them carefully, making the responsive flesh rigid to his touch. Eridan let a hiss through his rows of serrated teeth, trying to sit up a little. “Holy _fuck_ , Kar.”

 

Eridan found himself carding through Karkat's hair. Finally, his jungle trek proved successful when his fingertips bumped into treasure. He paused for a smug second as he felt Karkat bristle. Still smirking, Eridan enveloped that tiny horn firmly with his smooth palm. Karkat could twist and jerk around all he liked. It wouldn't do him any good.

 

He felt the other troll's body shiver like a leaf in response to the touch. So, of course, that meant he obviously had to take the pads of his thumb and forefinger and start stroking the protrusion at a steady, bullying pace. Not that there was much to fucking stroke. He had almost gotten fond of the sight of them, peeking shyly through all that hair... Both smooth and sand-papery, having a particular texture but no points to speak of. They begged to be touched, just like the rest of Karkat.

 

It was bad enough when he stroked gingerly around the base, but when he started flicking his fingers in circular motions over the rounded tip, he could feel muscles shudder in protest against him. A gurgled cross between a groan and a keen escaping the smaller troll's lips, his head still bent against Eridan's stomach. He squirmed and Eridan feasted on the sight of it like the sadistic bastard he was.

 

Karkat's shoulders and the side of his plump cheek were painted in a deep ruddy flush. He reached out in a haze to cup his face in one hand, their eyes meeting. _He's_ _burning up_ , he thought _,_ grinning inwardly.

 

“You're goin to tire yourself out wwith all that shakin' and quivverin, Kar-,” Eridan teased, fully intent on taking him to task about it and probably incorporating a few terrible fish puns just for the hell of it, should he find a way to shoehorn them in. Before he could, however, he was interrupted by Kar's stony glare and the sensation of dark striped cloth being pulled over his bony hip. They dragged down to his knees and, eventually, off his legs entirely.

 

Well. Karkat's rebuttal was removing him of his pants. He... He was strangely okay with this.

 

Unfortunately, the cold air hit him right where it hurt. Eridan wiggled like a defiant sea snake, growling in protest. But the cold didn't last for long because that mouth left his stomach and suddenly Karkat's head just wasn't there and his body was shifting along with it and uh... Wow...

 

Oh...

 

The hot tip of a tongue flicked down the length of his bulge and those complaints got oddly garbled, coming out as more of the suggestion of a startled groan. His matesprit's eyes found him again, half lidded with unhidden pleasure.

 

“Here's the deal, dumbass. You are going to lay there and shut your flapping stutterhole...” The tongue made contact again, burning and wet. It grazed over the crest of engorged flesh and, for a torturous moment, Eridan's breath may or may not have transformed into an embarrassing hiccup.

 

His knuckles tightened, his toes struggled against the cape and then shivered at what had to have been an intentional _horridly warm_ sigh against his crotch. Karkat's fingers squeezed down, massaging over his shame globes and then rolling them around in his hand. Eridan grunted, his legs fidgeting in a mixture of discomfort and...something else. Kar was handling just a little too roughly to show that he was serious.

 

“...Or I am going to fucking stop.”

 

_Aye, aye captain_. He could've saluted. The landweller quite literally had him by the balls.

 

His eyes followed as the smaller troll hunkered down and crouched, that cape still flowing around him. At first, Eridan had only been amused by the sight. Now, he was beginning to think it was sort of fetching, even if it didn't fit him at all. In any case, the sight of that high collar around his neck pleased him privately. _He's mine_ , he thought with a surge of tender pride. _This little jerk is all fuckin' mine_.

 

At the brush of lips against the tip, Eridan resisted the urge to close his eyes and simply resigned himself to blink slowly. There was no way he was going to miss watching this, not for even a second. Gradually, Kar's mouth parted and then suddenly, he was held prisoner, trapped in tight, wet warmth.

 

His skin sung, heat, pressure, the pleasure boiling to a bubble. Everything was swimming, just below his belly and in his legs, limbs, fingertips... Everywhere.

 

The landweller's tongue was hot, coiled hard against his bulge. He couldn't take much because of his size but, damn, if he didn't _try_. Karkat had released his balls at some point and instead chosen his thigh as his victim, his grip almost bruising. His fingertips dug in without any particular fond regard. Eridan straightened on his elbows, a moan tumbling like water out of his lips as Kar started to move his head in a slight bobbing motion, and the intensity of the slick friction was almost dizzying.

 

For all Eridan's effort, he forgot to use his ears or his eyes after that. Forgot he even had 'em... Even the thunderclap and a violent crash of waves in the distance outside their home was totally lost on him. The only thing that mattered was that perfect mouth and what it was doing to him-- but fuck all-- it was too much. It was too good. This would end fast if he didn't stop it.

 

He slumped down like a ton of bricks with all his weight on one arm, reaching out and giving Karkat's hair a tug, fierce this time. His words simultaneously tried to be demanding but twisted into a pathetic whining pant. “Shit, Kar... Wwe havve to stop... I can't... Gotta touch you.”

 

There was probably a gorgeous cast of purple painted on his face. He could tell by the way the other troll paused when he looked at him. It felt good to be looked at that way. Not just by the adoring public (hah fuckin' hah) but, rather, by someone who knew him and wanted him for everything he was. Eridan needed to be looked at that way. Karkat always obliged.

 

“You aren't getting any fucking complaints out of me. I was getting tired of listening to you glub like a hooked fish,” he said, snickering and drawing back.

 

“I didn't fuckin' glub, not evven once,” he protested irately, a little self conscious as he was not entirely sure whether he actually did that or not. Good fuckin' god, he hoped not, because it must have been hard to get sexy over someone if they were making fish noises. He pouted, with his words as well as his face. “...Oh, goddammit. Just...”

 

_Get ovver here_.  Before he could even make a half-arsed attempt to finish his sentence, he felt other troll shift at his feet and then crawl on him like a cat. The cape swished and slapped inconveniently in places, almost tripping him up. His knees tangled in it once, and at Eridan's snort of mirth, he muttered a disdainful, “Fuck you.”

 

The short troll spouted up like a weed in full sunlight, seeking out another kiss. He got one, distracted and sloppy, as greedy, slender fingers swiped down to curl around Kar's dripping bulge. Eridan cupped his hand to give it a firm, vengeful squeeze. It elicited a kind of pissed-off, half-smothered hiss that became quickly quelled as soon as he began running his stroking his smooth palm along the shaft.

 

Kar's lean body was so pliant against his that Eridan could feel literally every spasm of his scrawny muscles through his skin. Several times, thin lips almost slipped in their kiss. His array of snaggle-teeth grazed painfully over already stinging cuts as Eridan's hand moved with a mismatched rhythm, flicking a fin at Kar's burbling groan as he swelled in Eridan's hand.

 

His other hand palmed lightly over Karkat's ass as the landweller bowed his head, his face flushed and blaring with that unnatural (...ly beautiful...) color. He pressed back against the seadweller's angular collarbone, fighting against himself and his need as he arched into the offered palm, candy red pre dripping over sly fingers.

 

“Hey Kar,” Eridan muttered conversationally.

 

Kar's only response is a soft, impatient pant. Resolved to get a reaction, Eridan accompanied his words with hard squeeze to his rump, getting an indignant sputter for his trouble.

 

“Kar~” he said again, playfully, obnoxiously into his ear.

 

“Wwhat?” the Cancer said in his best death voice. The wave in the husky 'w' made the seadweller's lips purse into a frown that wanted to twitch into a goofy smile. A feeling tightened and swelled from deep inside him, this time originating from between his ribs instead of his legs. It just wasn't fair. He was not allowed to just dive-bomb him with intense… sappy feelings like that.

 

His soft cheek lay against Eridan's torso, all skin and bones. In the moment of odd stillness, he closed his eyes as if he intended to sleep there. Eridan found himself staring at his eyelashes. Kar had really sort of nice eyelashes for such a surly little monster. And pouty lips. And cheeks... Puffy little goddamn cheeks like a fucking squeakbeast. Was it even possible for someone to be any less threatening? The idea was fucking absurd.

 

“Nothin',” he responded cheerfully.

 

Lifting his head, Karkat furrowed his brow and bared his teeth at him irritably. “...I know it's really difficult for you since you have the attention span of a sea monkey on Ritalin, but can you please, stay on task? You've still got your hand on my cock, in case you... Y'know. _Forgot_ or something.”

 

Eridan chuckled and gave the offending bulge a few pumps just to prove he hadn't forgotten. His breathing quickened as Eridan's cold claws scratched lightly down the curve of his ass. His fins tuned keenly to the surprised exhale as one of his fingers slipped between his cheeks and brushed experimentally around his nook.

 

Karkat's hands, at some point he didn't track, ended up around his waist. They squeezed the seadweller tight in a pretty filthy variant of a hug. That finger rubbed insistently against his entrance, simply lingering and letting Kar get accustomed to its presence until he relaxed. This part always took the longest because Karkat was just so ridiculously tense and the process required patience from possibly the two most impatient people in the goddamn universe. But they always got through it.

 

When he thought Kar was ready, Eridan slipped one digit inside, probing into that furnace of a body. He felt prickling in his back as the smaller troll sunk the tips of his claws into his flesh with no malicious intent, simply too much contained energy with no place to go. As a highblood with a high pain threshold, Eridan hardly felt it except for a slight budding sting. It tempted him more than anything.

 

“... _Fuck_ ,” Karkat breathed, his face crushed against Eridan's chest, cringing as the finger twisted and sank deeper inside him. His face was shadowed and slightly concentrated as if in pain. The way he was occasionally subtly moving his hips back into his knuckles was anything but shy, however, and Eridan was not fooled at all. He added another shortly, tilting his sharp knuckles and spreading them once it was buried. He had always marveled at how heated Karkat's insides felt. He rhythmically stretched him, making a small noise himself as Karkat's fangs skidded and pierced into the soft flesh just below his neck. Several more drops of royalty wasted, lost to the world, as the aggressive little bastard moaned and shivered and came apart on his fingers.

 

God, he loved that. He had to see more.

 

Without warning, he started stroking Karkat's slick shaft again,so quick the responding noises almost sounded painful. His thumb brushed once over the turgid flesh, his palm sliding up and down the shaft. He drove his fingers in and out simultaneously, at a jerking pace, to keep things nice and even. Karkat began rocking with more obviousness, and his breathing steadily became heavier. He wanted it badly, even if Eridan wasn't quite mean enough to force him to admit it (at least not this time), he liked seeing the proof.

 

Karkat's voice was always an undercurrent, muttering cursewords as if in a prayer. When Eridan heard his own name added to the slurry his bulge twitched again. He was unbearably hard but he could've kept it up longer just for the satisfaction of watching. However, Karkat stirred in his lap and loosened one arm to press it against his collarbone.

 

“S-stop,” he ground out, his command choked with arousal. He was panting, hair mussed, chest rising and falling. Edible looking, his expression slack and deliciously ill composed.

 

Eridan didn't need further incentive. His fingers slipped out and off him and soon, he was left too empty and cold. Kar shifted on top of him and then just sat there like a rock for a drawn out moment that lasted too fucking long.

 

He didn't care how it happened at this point, he _needed_ Kar. He reached out to him with a possessive squeeze of his hand but to no avail. Kar still didn't move.  Eridan frowned in confusion.

 

“Wwhat the fuck are you evven wwaitin' for? Get _on_ me!” Subtlety. Always one of his major strengths.

 

Crazily, Karkat's lips tugged into a smirk that was almost broken, as if he'd been punched in the face while attempting to execute it. Eridan's bulge throbbed painfully but he wrestled the whimper down and gave his dear beloved matesprit a pissed-off glare and a warning tone. “Kar-”

 

But then those legs squeezed almost possessively around Eridan's slender abdomen and Karkat's expression softened to become both gentle and infuriatingly content. He glowed with that red flush blooming all over his body, his hair wild from all the tussling and his eyes bright. Eridan knew he was the only one who would ever get to see him like this. Words tried to start but stuttered in his throat. He wasn't even sure what he was going to say anything in the first place.

 

Finally, he noticed the ridiculous collar, still fanning out behind him, and suddenly he knew exactly what Karkat wanted him to do. It was, after all, in accordance with their previous conversation. The realization of it almost made him want to laugh, but he was too lost in the moment to give it much further thought. Instead, he just reached up to fulfill the simple request.

 

The motion seemed to slow everything down, but he was far too involved to wish for it to go faster. The seadweller's hands slid over the purple fabric at Karkat's shoulders, got a firm grip on it, and began pulling. He watched, transfixed, as it went down. His hands didn't let go, but continued to pull the cape even as it coiled prettily around Karkat's hip. His thumb working on the button clasp automatically, though he found it odd to do it for someone besides himself. That was around the time he stopped looking. The cape fell away and then seemed to blur into nonexistence. He couldn't have said where it ended up after that.

 

They looked at each other.

 

Now it was just the two of them.

 

“C'mon Kar,” he urged, his voice gentle this time.

 

“O-okay hold your goddamn h-hoofbeasts,” the other troll replied, his fingers clenching.

 

Karkat's hands hovered awkwardly until they closed around him tightly, fingers threading into a lock. The seadweller shifted with his back against the floor as Karkat clumsily aligned him with his body, pressing his teeth into his own, abused lips, Eridan watched his face as he sunk down on his cock, cautiously and then with relish, like someone submerging themselves in a hot spring.

 

His gut tightened and a moan rolled out of him, sprung from the tightness encasing him. The two of them shivered from their lips to the tips of their toes. It seemed to take an eternity and somewhere in the midst of it, their knuckles found each other, fingers unfolding and sheathing. Eridan's grasped over the smaller set, quivering to the wrists and squeezing _hard._

 

Then there was no command to get on with it, no complaints, no bitching, no talking at all. Nothing interrupted the shared silence except their own unsteady bouts of breathing.

 

Eridan was soon deep inside him, almost to the hilt, when Karkat began rocking. His first few unsteady movements were followed by honest to god whimpers, unpoliced by his constant self-consciousness. He didn't hesitate for long, but started an erratic rhythm as Eridan's hand released and reached to get a grip on his back. His claws outstretched he sunk his claws deep into the other troll's midsection and left a burning line of red Karkat groaned and worked himself up and down in these fucking amazing rolling circles, oddly dexterous for someone so bony and ungainly.

 

“Nn...Ff- _Ah_.”

 

He was so hot and tight and as the pace increased he became relentless and Eridan, so lost in the thrusts, skipped several breaths. They tumbled out of him, pent up and gasping. He couldn't stand it, he couldn't put up with it. But holy hell did he not want to stop either. As if that was even an option, he was underneath him, trapped in the pace of this tangled writhing.

 

The smaller troll's lips trembled as he tried to make noise, say a word. But he was unable to make any sound at all and Eridan just heard his throat click. He kept his eyes firmly down, unfocused and almost tired looking while his body told a different story.

 

Eridan couldn't resist, he drew his hand back and slapped that bucking ass, grinning like an utter dickwad as Karkat looked at him poisonously and gasped rude things at him. In retaliation, he felt Karkat claw bitchily at his shoulders, though he wasn't able to do as much damage. Instead he resorted to holding them tight, using them for leverage for a few hard thrusts that put knots of coiling, burning pleasure in Eridan's belly.

 

It felt so fucking fantastic, _Karkat_ felt fantastic, and their sex was becoming possessive as wrestling. It was almost as if they were both afraid that the other would try to escape, but neither intended on letting that happen. At some point, he felt one of Kar's hands leave his shoulder and he watched for a moment as Kar started to jerk himself roughly before finally relenting and closing his eyes to swim in the newly darkened world.

 

“Kar...” he groaned, pressing up harder though it was impossible to be deeper inside him. He felt like he need to be. “ _Karkat._ ”

 

Eridan found himself murmuring his name and variants over and over, his throat clicking and tightening until he was hoarse. He said it until he was sure they both would stop noticing it completely, and at the interval between gasping cursewords and nonsense, he thought he got an _Eridan_ or two. Or at least a few shaky attempts at it.

 

When his eyes blinked open again he saw Kar's hand snatch up to cover his own face with his hand, unable to keep looking at what he's doing to himself, to Eridan, to the both of them. The great surge of pity Eridan felt when he saw him was so strong that it overwhelmed his lust for the moment. Kar was just a hot mess, a little bundle of frayed nerves. Relaxing even _now_ was a challenge. Maybe it was one of those things that would never get easier. Maybe that was just a part of the experience of being his matesprit.

 

Eridan was all kinds of okay with that.

 

Still holding each other close, Eridan sought Kar's hand again and forced it down to the floor. Their fingers twined and knotted together, just like their bodies. He heard the sudden intake of breathe when Kar couldn't control himself anymore and lost it, red dripping down Eridan's chest in a burst of heat as the other troll covered his mouth, his cries half-smothered by his own palm.

 

He only stopped for a split second, the sound dying into a ragged sigh. Karkat's muscles went slack as a blanket with exhaustion, but he took it like a champ and just as ferociously as before, started to move his hips again. The effort was flagged with tiredness and oversensitivity, but at this point, Eridan was holding him so tight and moving so much with his own upward thrusts that it made up for it. The seadweller's spine arched, his foreheard bent down, coming close to resting at Karkat's belly.

 

“ _Come on, asshole,_ ” he heard Karkat's hoarse voice murmur against his fin.

 

“ _Don't keep me waiting._ ”

 

The tickle of his breath, like sea breeze on sensitive flesh, gave him that final electric shiver. His orgasm burned like lightening, stole all the air from him, netted him, his body jerked as consuming feelings engulfed him and dragged him under.

 

Sound didn't leave but vibrated in his throat, his toes curled. Karkat's body didn't stop moving until every ounce of tension was gone and his own body became limp and covered in cold sweat. His fingers backtracked down Karkat's softer skin, slick with cold, drying blood, leaving obscene red tracks as they roamed. Unique evidence for every single crime they had committed.

 

This secret part of him, only Eridan got to see was not his blood color, made darker and unintelligible in the moonlight. His thoughts were only focused on the softness of Kar's face, and how relaxed he seemed. Devoid of tension, devoid of even the energy to yell at things. Eridan forgot who he was and just lived in his skin and eyes and ears for what seemed like hours, but could've only been a small expanse of minutes.

 

“ _Kar_ ,” he purred without purpose, flattening out his palms to keep him there. He didn't want him to move yet. He didn't want it to end.

 

But eventually it had to, the feeling started crawling back into his fingers and he flexed them, grunting as his muscles ached in protest. It was a good ache, however. Slowly, his hands hook over his torso and helped Kar pull away. Without waiting another moment however, the seadweller wrapped his arms around the shorter troll tightly and fell, forcing him to fall back with him in a heap, eliciting a few nettled grumblings out of him, but no complaints.

 

Kar burrowed against Eridan, nuzzling under his chin and deciding to set up camp against his chest. He sighed contentedly as their legs twined, like two snakes who'd gotten in a fight but were too tired to untangle themselves. Occasionally, they bitched quietly at each other or played lazy footsies in the early moon light. Kar's toes brushed against Eridan's ankles as they fought idly for the shared space.

 

Carnal floor sex called for equally carnal floor cuddling, at least when it came to the resident nubby horned cuddlebeast king. Eridan didn't mind though. Not one bit. In that darkness only partially bled with pale light, time got lost and the only indication that it was passing at all was the background track of rain, steadily beginning to dwindle in their peripherals.

 

When he realized they were only accompanied by the occasional drip of water into the rain gutter, Eridan had the sense to be afraid he might fall asleep, but it was Karkat's voice that broke the companionable silence, hoarse but playful. “Good evening, Indiana Fucking Jones.”

 

Eridan smirked and snuffled into his hair as Karkat squirmed on top of him. He didn't see the need to raise his voice above a little more than a whisper, since it was just the two of them. “Not that I'm complain' or anythin' but... Is there any _special_ sort a' reason you stole my fuckin' cape and jumped me like a mad man?” He frowned. “I kind a had plans an' noww I'm too lazy to evven think about goin' anywwhere, Kar.”

 

“Rain's stopped now,” his companion replied smugly. “I feel better about you leaving when our front porch _isn't_ a fucking scene from the movie about the dumb broad with the dog and the yellow brick road.” He slipped down a little, pressing his lips in a snickering kiss against Eridan's sleek belly, eliciting a long sigh out of the lanky seadweller. Well, maybe not as sleek as it had been before Kar started cooking for me, he thought as he felt the comfortable press of those lips, not looking forward to their absence.

 

“I have plans today too, dicknoodle” Karkat continued, his voice against his skin. “So you are going to put those boots back on and get out of my hair, capiche?”

 

“I'm not goin' anywwhere until you make me some goddamn... golden browwn pocketed confectioneries,” Eridan said, sulkily. “An' I wouldn't hang out in your hair for anythin' Kar. You wwash it about once a year.”

 

Karkat grinned darkly, his voice smooth as melting butter as he stretched and rested his cheek on the stomach he'd been kissing, half closing his eyes. “I'm sorry I think my stunted landweller thinkpan is having trouble deciphering your high class dialect. Damn. You're going to have to be specific. What exactly is it that you're asking for?”

 

Eridan sighed. Goddamn the peasants and their delicious food of _witchcraft_. “You're actually doin' this. You're actually goin' to fuckin' put me through this.”

 

That grin said everything, not only was he going to do it, he was going to enjoy it thoroughly. “Come on. Say it.”

 

Oh hell. FINE.

 

“Wwaffles.”

 

Later, just before the storms started up again, Eridan tasted the lingering sweetness of syrup. It could've been from one of the six waffles he tore apart...or perhaps Karkat's lips. Through the rest of the hunt, when cold rain was soaking into his clothes, he remembered that acutely. And by some manner of strange landweller witchcraft, he was more careful for it.

**Author's Note:**

> Credit to my amazing editor mwah mwah
> 
> She inspired the whole thing by drawing this lovely piece:
> 
> http://supercatgirl.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d4rnkuk
> 
> ..do people normally write 12 pages of porn? fff I can't write anything short. It's a disease. Send help.


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